this is king george of england. he was an evil tyrant who wanted to steal america’s money by selling us tea and rape all the scottish women.
this is george washington. he was first a philosopher and invented freedom, but the british were all gay and banned it, so he started an army and invented america.
this is where george washington explained how freedom worked to all the rich dudes in america who hated tea. they all voted to start drinking coffee instead of tea, because they decided tea was british and, thus, gay. also they declared war on britain for crimes against manliness and liberty.
this picture is america defeating the british in the battle of london in the american revolution. america invaded england and took over the country for a while before we got bored and left.
mel gibson fought in the war. all the red coats were pussies and ran away from him and his american flag. he got mad when the british killed his family by lighting them all on fire while they were at church, so invented the american flag spear and killed the british general with it and ended the war.
so america was invented and freed from british tyranny after the war. then we spent like the next 150 years invading pussy countries like mexico and canada and taking their land. then we killed all the indians because they were stupid and still played with bows and arrows.
so then after that we stopped hitler and invented fried chicken and stuff like that. so now the world is free thanks to america and cool and stuff like that.
cool american stuff:
we claimed the moon, so that the soviets wouldn’t make it communist.
we nuked japan because, lets face it, anime is gay and somebody had to stop them.
reagan invented freedom 2.0, where rich people get to keep all their money, since they earned it by working hard and poor people are lazy. and then he singlehandedly ended the soviet union by yelling at the berlin wall.
some patriotic americans
everyone in the USA has guns and we will shoot you if you say something we don’t agree with.
american football is the manliest sport possible.
9/11 changed everything. everything. never forget.
in conclusion: USA is #1 and george bush will invade you if you don’t agree.
